The Oxford English Dictionary defines the word cryptid as “An animal whose existence or survival is disputed or unsubstantiated, such as the yeti.” For the following witnesses to living cryptids, there is no dispute. In this series of National Cryptid Society’s case files, you will read what the witnesses have experienced in their own words. Not everyone has the same perspective or experience, so eyewitness accounts may vary in length and detail.
Keep an open mind when reading these accounts, and also remember one’s perception and memory of an event can be influenced by the emotions felt at the time of the occurrence. The contributors to this series of articles are doing the best they can to recount what are in some cases very shocking and traumatic experiences.
If you have a personal cryptid sighting story you would like to tell us, our contact information is at the bottom of this article.
NCS Case File #20: Bavarian Wood Fairies Scare the Hell out of Large, Pipe-Smoking, Cane-Wielding, Big German Man who is also Tall.
Submitted by Meistermalkav
“Basically, I think I saw fairies, but I am not sure. To preface it, I am against going “omg, cryptid”, because it gives a sense of going “I already dun know what I saw, haw haw haw.”
That being said, I walk on a cane, thanks to illness, but I do enjoy the woods where I grew up in. You can tell me all about how the woods are scary and bad, but to a German country boy, going through the woods in Bavaria, clocking in at over 6 feet, with a sturdy cane, there is not much terrifying sh*t going on. Worst I ever saw was a single confused wild Boar. It went on the way, noticed me smoking my pipe, grunted, and went away. Keeping my distance from it, and I did not f*ck with it. Live and let live. Probably was as confused to see me as I was to see it.
Now, after a few years, I had the wanderlust again, so when I went to my mothers to visit her, who lives kind of near a wood, I went like, let’s have a pipe (Of tobacco, if necessary, you seem to have to clarify it when americans are present…), and a stroll through the woods.
Now, the climate was typical for Bavaria, nice wind, some clouds, but a bit towards the evening. So, after walking for a while, with my headphones in, I get this tickle on the back of my neck. Now, I must repeat this here. I am over 6 feet, built to scale, and I have a cane. I have seen nothing scarier than the master woodsman tapping me on the shoulder asking me what the f*ck is wrong with me for smoking in the woods, with his gun suspiciously almost pointed at me. I am not scared of sh*t, and I can use that cane if worse comes to worse to give anybody quite a thrashing.
I pull the headphones, and check my senses. Sight is clear. I just hear this noise…. like a very spastic squirrel running full speed into a pile of dead leaves. Strange, but not unheard of. Squirrels usually have this kind of madness about them, and to be honest, it’s not hurting anybody, so f*ck it, let them run. I treat it like drunk people. As long as they are not hurting anybody, fine by me, I have done silly sh*t in my life.
I grab my cane closer, put my headphones on low, and put them back in, keeping, you know, an ear out for trouble. I walk on, and the tickling does not go away. And I keep thinking this through, because, what the f*ck, I usually don’t react this way. Then it hits me.
I have walked for perhaps 10 minutes, and the skittering sound has not disappeared. That must be one dedicated squirrel. I think, well, maybe it wants some nuts, or something, or is just bored out of its mind, or shit…. Nothing harmfull, right? After all, from the skittering noise, it’s light, it’s making way too much noise to be sneaky, so… I get curious.
I turn around, and track the skittering, like just by seeing where the noise is the strongest, and where the motion is. As anybody knows who has played hide and seek in the woods, pretty effective. I suddenly notice the skittering is in front of me, to the right, near where an old logging road goes off from the way, and I am thinking, heh, am I going to see a squirrel drunk on bad apples or what? Might be worth a chuckle. So I just go, “HARUMPH”, because if they are actually scared of me, this gives them time to fuck off. Nothing. Skittering continues. So, I put my best swagger on, and as I look around the curve, I see it.
In the half dark of the forest, hanging in mid air, about 25 to 30 meters away, is a glowing blue light. A soft glow, I give you that, but still, a glow, swaying side to side. And right where the skittering is supposed to be, by my ears. Only I stare at it, and I notice, it’s dead quiet. No skittering. No nothing. Just dead quiet. It is hanging there, in mid air, roughly at knee level, and I am looking at it, not knowing what to make of it. It is eerily still.
Then, the skittering sets in again, and it moves towards me. Not swaying side to side, not floundering about, but straight at me. Bee line straight.
Now, as I said before, I am 6 foot plus, I am by no means a small guy, and I have a good stable cane with me, but the horror I felt at that thing…. I noped out of there. I am not squeamish against anything, I know my forest critters, and I know the occasional prank, because God knows I played some in my days. I just noped out of there for roughly half an hour, at top speeds, until I was near civilization.
Now, if I had to describe what really freaked me out, and believe me, I thought long and hard about it, you know those horror movies? Where they have the trope like squelching violins? And you know, soon, something will happen? Mix that with nails on a chalkboard, but remove all sounds. Leave just your response to it.
Now, as I said, there was no rational reason to be that afraid. Looking back, I doubt whatever it was could have seriously withstood a blow with the cane, just based on size. Now for all I know, some jackass caught himself a squirrel, drugged it with enough caffeine and meth to make it skitter like crazy, and painted it with bioluminescent paint. No qualms about it, I just didn’t see it with my eyes, because of the light levels, haha.
What really got to me though was that feeling of suddenly, without a buildup, having that horror, and that flee reaction. I am not a small man. Even for a German, and a Bavarian, I am tall. And I have the mass to back it up. But for a simple blue light to scare the sh*t out of me like that…. makes you think.
Never saw the light again, not sure what it was, but goddamn it, I have since then not stepped foot again in that wood, and I prefer walking the open fields and the village to village roads before I go back at dusk to this place in the woods. And before you go, “could it have been them Will-o’-the-wisps”, I never heard of Will-o’-the-wisps in non swampy areas.”
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2 thoughts on “NCS Case File #20: Bavarian Wood Fairies Scare the Hell out of Large, Pipe-Smoking, Cane-Wielding, Big German Man who is also Tall.”
But…why won’t he tell us how tall he was?